the score

I knew Texas would beat Nebraska the moment I saw a Cornhuskers fan in the stands do the "Horns down" sign for the television camera. Oh how the mighty have fallen. There was a day not too long ago when Big Red looked down on Burnt Orange in a nice, condescending, Midwestern kind of way. I remember when my father sold his company to a Nebraska-based firm in the Eighties. The boss of the new conglomerate came with us to a Longhorn game and acted a lot like he was at an Abilene Christian T-ball contest, oh so quaint it was. Now I imagine many Cornies are chocking up the Horns' latest win to dumb luck. But we know the truth: Aaron Ross created another fumble and the Huskers no longer believe. Read More | 2 Comments »

Some of you may be wondering what happened to the Longhorns in the first quarter as the Baylor Bears put the hurt on the reigning national champs for a nanosecond before totally falling apart. As a guy who was formerly sort-of engaged to a Baylor co-ed, I can sum it up in one word: naughty.

Yes, the Bears were being naughty. Everyone told them they didn’t have a chance against the big, bad Mega-State-U, and they looked upon it much as they did when told that dancing is sinful, and sleeping with a preacher’s daughter is a lot more fun when it’ll send you straight to hell. (Hell, by the way, is located somewhere near Waco, I have it on good authority.) It made them want to do it even more. Read More | 1 Comment »

Number Nine, Number Nine: The first BCS standings came out Sunday and things don't look so hot for the Texas Longhorns, who debuted at No. 9, despite being ranked No. 5 in the human polls. It will be mighty difficult for the Longhorns to get into the championship game over a one-loss SEC team, a one-loss Ohio State, or an undefeated Louisville or West Virginia. But crazier things have happened.

AD, Good Night: As if Oklahoma's season could get any more disappointing, they lost Adrian Peterson for the rest of eternity on Saturday afternoon after AD broke his collarbone diving into the end zone after a highlight-reel 53-yard scamper which capped the Sooners’ 34-9 victory over Iowa State. So, the best player in college football will not win the Heisman Trophy for about the 43rd time. Players like Peterson come along about every 20 years, even at factories like Oklahoma, and for him to have only played one full season of college football is really a shame, no matter who you root for. Read More | Comment »

Somewhere behind perfectly manicured hedges, Donovan McNabb’s patronizing mama comforts her sobbing son with a warm bowl of Campbell’s Chunky Soup. The bruises on McNabb’s hip from Charles Grant's helmet make every swallow a wince-filled reminder of the New Orleans Saints’ 27-24 victory over the Philadelphia Eagles Sunday afternoon. Former Westlake Chaparral Drew Brees filled McNabb’s temporarily-vacated hero role by tossing three critical touchdowns and meticulously leading his team on an eight-and-a-half minute drive that clipped the wings of the visiting Eagles with a game-winning field goal. As the Superdome crowd enjoyed its team’s third straight home victory, football pundits nationwide could be heard in mass literally thrusting themselves upon the Saints bandwagon with the urgency of a ravenous carpetbagging herd. Read More | Comment »

The Crying Boy of OU is apparently getting his mug plastered all over T-shirts and e-mail attachments slinging back and forth across the Red River. See the above photo of the sobbing youngster who may or may not have been upset that his beloved Sooners got squashed by the University of Texas Longhorns. Or maybe his dad wouldn't buy him a corny dog.

In either case, he's not the only one in Norman with crocodile tears. OU Coach Bob Stoops has also been letting a few drip over what he sees as "questionable" calls made in favor of Texas in the Sooners' 28-10 loss last Saturday. Was it a lateral or was it a forward pass? Did Adrian Peterson actually fumble or did the ground knock the ball loose? Who cares, Bob? You lost. Read More | 5 Comments »

If you would have told Pig Skinny on Friday afternoon that the Oklahoma Sooners would outgain the Texas Longhorns 332-232 and go eight-for-16 on third down, the Skinny would have declared a certain victory for the Sooners based on early returns. Unfortunately for OU, the Sooners also loaded the ballot box with five turnovers and 11 penalties. The 28-10 final was in question well into the fourth quarter, but the defining moment of the game came in the third, when UT's offensive line moved the OU defensive front seven yards on a third-and-one quarterback sneak. Kudos to the UT program, who proved they aren't just a bunch of pansies who can't win without Vince Young, and to all the Longhorn fans around Austin who will undoubtedly not let me forget the game any time before 362 days from now. The Sooners again got jobbed on some calls in a big game, at least this time it didn't overtly affect the outcome. It's pretty obvious at this point that Herr Stoopsy has lost his vice grip on his team's focus. The false-start penalties are completely unacceptable this late in the season, and if Bob and the boys can't do any better than that, we might as well not even show up for the game.
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Just in the nick of time, major dividend No. 1 darted for 65 yards and a game-winning touchdown against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. The number of new friends Reggie Bush made in New Orleans Saints country Sunday afternoon with that oh-so-timely punt return puts census workers to swamp boots and pirough oars. It was indeed a murky win, with seemingly secure leads fed to visitors like tables piled with miles of crawfish. Was it some sort of gentlemanly gesture for Sean Payton’s offense to cease ramming Deuce McAllister down the throats of the baby-soft Bucs defense? No. 26 had a whopping 117 yards by halftime, yet only carried the ball six times for six yards in the second half. Drew Brees looked like his already usual steady self, engineering a somewhat loaded offense without a single turnover to spare. Yes, even stone-hands Ernie Conwell managed to embrace a share of victory with a third-quarter touchdown reception.

For more on the Saints, UT-OU, and the Reagan Raiders ... Read More | Comment »

While Vince Young was celebrating his first pro start by spitting out the grass the Dallas Cowboys' defense had shoved into his craw, last year's second-best Texas college quarterback was all but forgotten.

If you don't know the name Barrick Nealy, you missed out on – next to Vince's win (yes, he did it himself) over USC in the Rose Bowl – the most exciting football in these parts, circa 2005. About now you're saying to yourself, "Sure, that's easy in I-AA ball." Don't tell that to the Texas A&M Aggies who should have lost to Barrick's Texas State Bobcats. And don't forget that I-AA has a playoff system Texas State almost blew through thanks to Nealy's pyrotechnics.

Almost. That should be the catchphrase for this Vince Young doppelganger. Read More | 4 Comments »

DPS will increase patrols Friday and Saturday along I-35 between Austin and Dallas to monitor traffic headed to Dallas for the Texas-Oklahoma football game. Troopers will concentrate on finding aggressive drivers, as well as speeders and drunken drivers on their way to the game or on their way home. They'll also look for people who are not wearing safety belts. Any drivers caught carrying an Oklahoma driver's license will be asked to leave the state immediately. Read More | Comment »

You already knew that, now Austin's Independence Brewing Co. has put it in a bottle. Run over to Central Market before supplies run out and get a 12-pack of their limited-edition "Oklahoma Suks" brand of beer. It will taste especially sweet while UT runs up the score. Read More | Comment »

The Red River Shootout is this weekend, and as the Longhorns and Sooners players prepare for a dogfight, fans continue the relatively pointless argument regarding who has the better program. Unfortunately for Texas, numbers don’t lie. The Horns lead the all-time series of 100 games 56-39-5 (though since the end of World War II, the series is virtually even, with UT ahead 29-28-3), and are the defending national champions. Otherwise, UT has little to hang their 10-gallon hat on:

	OKLAHOMA	TEXAS
National Championships	7	3
Conference Titles	39	26
Heisman Trophies	4	2
National Award Winners	33	17
All-Americans	141	115
Bowl Record	24-14-1 (.628)	22-21-2 (.511)
Weeks No. 1 by AP	95 (No. 1)	42 (No. 8)
Weeks Top 5 by AP	342 (No. 1)	248 (No. 7)

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There are conflicting accounts of what happened in the final minutes of the Sept. 16 football game between Oklahoma and Oregon in Eugene. But those with knowledge of the controversial decisions and the replay process said it appeared to unfold this way:
1. Oregon scored a touchdown to cut Oklahoma's lead to 33-27 with 1:12 remaining in the game. Oregon kicker Luke Bellotti lined up for an onside kick attempt. Replay official Gordon Riese communicated to his assistant, Roger Judd, that the ensuing call would automatically be a reviewable play regardless of who recovered.
2. The kick bounced high off the Autzen Stadium turf, and in the scramble for the ball, an official on the field blew his whistle, believing Oregon's Patrick Chung had recovered. Officials signaled that it was Oregon's ball with 1:06 left.
3. As per his duties as replay official, Riese radioed referee Dave Cutaia and said he wanted to review the play. Riese had questions about whether the ball had traveled the required 10 yards before being touched and whether it had been first touched by an Oklahoma player, as ruled on the field.
4. The network production team rushed to prepare video feeds and then sent them to Riese and Judd. The replay officials received the feeds but struggled with technical aspects of the equipment. The replay booth does not have access to the over-the-air broadcast, so officials did not see the angles that fans at home saw. All the officials watched was a single angle being played on the Autzen Stadium monitor for fans.
5. After a delay of several minutes, Cutaia radioed to ask Riese if he had a decision. Riese, who had been admonished by the Pacific-10 conference last season for taking nearly four minutes to review a play, said, "I didn't get a view. Dave, there's no way I can overturn this."
6. Cutaia then announced there was "conclusive evidence that an Oklahoma player touched the ball first." The ruling on the field stood. Read More | Comment »

In case you missed it in print, this was my preseason "Pig Skinny" column:

I'll Place Money That One of These 10 Teams Will Win the BCS Championship
(You Get Everybody Else and Texas)

Sorry, Longhorns. The schedule is too tough, and the quarterback situation is going to be worse than you think, especially in the first half of the season. That being said, that's exactly how this list was compiled: talent level balanced against the favorability of the slate. The race for the glass football is wide open this year, and I predict that nobody finishes the regular season undefeated (click below for Top 10 and first-month analysis)... Read More | Comment »